"Use your words" is probably the phrase I have said the most in the last 7 days. It's a phrase that has always made me cringe when moms say it to their toddlers and it still does even though I use it like a maniac. Unfortunately in the tradition of "mother knows best", moms have used it so much because it works so well. Charli is getting more independent and decisive by the day and while she's doing well with speaking, she's nowhere close to full sentences and having a vocab that expresses emotions- she's still working on the verbs and nouns.
I keep trying to think of a more creative, less irking, way to say it that will communicate to Charli what I want her to do. I wish I had time to say "Sweetheart, you aren't really a baby any more and while I understand you're still learning to speak, this whole screaming thing isn't working, could you try searching the 40 words you know and use one of them to help me understand a little better?" but "use your words" is quicker and more concise so it is what I find myself saying repeatedly.
I'm also realizing that I have to change a fair bit of my vocabulary. Firstly, words like "stupid" and "dumb" need to be eradicated. They don't have to but since I'm not going to let Charli say them, I want to set the example... and I probably shouldn't be the one she learns her unsay-able words from. Also, let's get real for a sec, should a grown woman really be using those words?
While I'm an open, fairly uninhibited person, I have no tolerance for potty-talk. And I do mean NO tolerance. In fact, if I had it my way, we'd never even say the word "bathroom" and revert to asking where the water closet is. A perfect world for me would definitely exclude the reality the we even have a need for the WC, other than to shower. However, I now have a little person who is in the beginning stages of potty training, so "peepee" and a few other words have been added to my vocabulary.
It is amazing to me how quickly and happily I will jump out of my comfort zone and alter pieces of me that I have refused to change for years simply because of one little pint sized person. She is cute, she is sometimes cuddly and she is growing up fast. My opportunity to love her and teach her the right things is not so long but incredibly important for how she sees God and people and the world. I have bigger battles to fight for her than what words I do or don't use and not enough time to do it all before she's off on her own and that is why if you play Word Bingo at my house anytime in the near future, you should include "use," "your" and "words."
Monday, February 25, 2013
Monday, February 18, 2013
Chit chat and all that
Months and months have gone by. Charli is now 20 months old and she is more of a little girl than a baby in almost every area of life. Two months ago she really started to try to communicate using English, not just the few signs I had taught her. While her pronunciation needs some polishing up, she's come so far in such a short time and is about 6 months ahead of where the doctor expects her speech to be. I'm not sure whether to attribute it to her extreme smarts (inherited from her parents of course) or whether it's simply being the youngest person always having to try to keep up with the rest of us.
Either way, she has really mastered saying 'hi' and 'bye' along with every animal sound I could think of teaching her. In fact, we ran out of them so I taught her that a lizzard sticks it's tongue in and out and a giraffe says 'yum yum yum' as it eats leaves.
She's come up with her owns ways to say the names of her 4 grandparents and 13 aunts and uncles and her 2 Chinese brothers (our international students YW and TC). She knows to say 'yes' and 'no' when I ask if she wants something because I no longer respond to her head shaking.
Much to my delight, she's begun singing with me at the piano and in the car. Her favorite song right now is "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" with a second verse involving a lion taught to her by my friend Erin. 'Baa Baa Blacksheep' is a close second, always managing to rouse a concerned look when we mention the little boy who lives down the lane.
While all this English is wonderfully exciting, I've also tried to pass on a bit of my Zimbabwean heritage by teaching her to understand a few phrases in Shona. They're simple phrases really that I use over and over with her like "bata maoko" when I want her to clap or "usa netsa Chelsea" when she's poking the cat while he tries to nap. I don't expect her to become conversant in it (I'm not), I just want her to get used to hearing the sounds of it so she can more accurately pronounce the words when she gets older. However, these phrases always seem to cause a stir when used in public. At the very least people feel the need to clarify among themselves that I am indeed speaking a different language. I have a bad tendency of over/misusing the word 'iwei' which could be translated as 'hey you.' I would never say "hey you" to Charli to get her attention but somehow in Shona it just slips out. Unfortunately it sounds almost exactly the same as the way we pronounce YW's name. Thankfully he hasn't taken issue with the fact that in an effort to pass on some African heritage, I am simply confusing our whole household.
I can't believe how much Charli understands us and how much she can communicate back. I know that pretty soon she'll be learning her letters and numbers and explaining back to me how and why we use the forms of communication we use. Until then, I find myself soaking up the hugs and kisses that come so easily right now because I know that soon she will be able to communicate affection with words and while I hope the hugs and kisses never stop all together, as part of growing up, they'll be given less and less.
Either way, she has really mastered saying 'hi' and 'bye' along with every animal sound I could think of teaching her. In fact, we ran out of them so I taught her that a lizzard sticks it's tongue in and out and a giraffe says 'yum yum yum' as it eats leaves.
She's come up with her owns ways to say the names of her 4 grandparents and 13 aunts and uncles and her 2 Chinese brothers (our international students YW and TC). She knows to say 'yes' and 'no' when I ask if she wants something because I no longer respond to her head shaking.
Much to my delight, she's begun singing with me at the piano and in the car. Her favorite song right now is "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" with a second verse involving a lion taught to her by my friend Erin. 'Baa Baa Blacksheep' is a close second, always managing to rouse a concerned look when we mention the little boy who lives down the lane.
While all this English is wonderfully exciting, I've also tried to pass on a bit of my Zimbabwean heritage by teaching her to understand a few phrases in Shona. They're simple phrases really that I use over and over with her like "bata maoko" when I want her to clap or "usa netsa Chelsea" when she's poking the cat while he tries to nap. I don't expect her to become conversant in it (I'm not), I just want her to get used to hearing the sounds of it so she can more accurately pronounce the words when she gets older. However, these phrases always seem to cause a stir when used in public. At the very least people feel the need to clarify among themselves that I am indeed speaking a different language. I have a bad tendency of over/misusing the word 'iwei' which could be translated as 'hey you.' I would never say "hey you" to Charli to get her attention but somehow in Shona it just slips out. Unfortunately it sounds almost exactly the same as the way we pronounce YW's name. Thankfully he hasn't taken issue with the fact that in an effort to pass on some African heritage, I am simply confusing our whole household.
I can't believe how much Charli understands us and how much she can communicate back. I know that pretty soon she'll be learning her letters and numbers and explaining back to me how and why we use the forms of communication we use. Until then, I find myself soaking up the hugs and kisses that come so easily right now because I know that soon she will be able to communicate affection with words and while I hope the hugs and kisses never stop all together, as part of growing up, they'll be given less and less.
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