"Can I pop?" and other queries

I'm 32 weeks pregnant. That means there's only 8 weeks until my due date. That also means that if the baby comes a few weeks early like I've been hoping, I'll be able to breathe with full lung capacity in 6 weeks!

Yup, the breathing just keeps getting harder. About a month ago I discovered the only way to put my shoes on quickly was to hold my breath while I bent over. About 2 weeks ago I realized my lack of motivation to weed simply comes from a lack of ability to sit on the ground and bend over at the same time. Two nights ago we were watching Chicago Code and I dropped the remote control. To get it myself would have required me to:

1. Lay down sideways (bending)

2. Roll off the couch (bending)

3. Stand up straight before (believe it or not, this too requires me to bend to be able to get straight)

4. Doing a very ungraceful pregnant-lady plie (definite bending)

5. Stand up straight again so let my lungs get a fill then finally

6. Sitting back down on the couch

By the time all this would be done, I would be gasping for breath and there would be no need for the remote as all 4 minutes of advertisements would have been done and the show back on. Thank goodness for a husband who's more than willing to help with these usually-menial-now-slightly-traumatic experiences.

Yes, occasionally I have a flare for the dramatic but not in this case. Avoiding bending is simply a matter of survival right now.

You see, my stomach has extended as far out as it possibly can. There is no possible room left in there for it to be pushed forward. Because of this, I have started to grow sideways. Yup, sideways.

In spite of the baby taking up extra room on my sides, it has decided there's something about being below my belly button that it doesn't like. So it keeps it's body right about level with it- putting it's arms and legs up into my rib cage. My lungs especially enjoy this during the now-regular 4am stretches that include an extra amount of fist and foot pumping. I find myself waking up gasping for air, as one does when it's lungs get punched repeatedly.

Once I got beyond morning sickness, I've had a pretty easy pregnancy. When people try to keep me from doing daily tasks, moving things or picking things up, my mantra has been "I'm pregnant, not an invalid"... until now. Several times a day my questions about who this baby will be get interrupted by logistical questions like "The baby still has to grow. Does that mean it'll just get tighter living quarters for these last few weeks or does that mean I'm gonna pop? CAN I pop? " and "I heard this baby's supposed to begin moving lower so I can breathe? Will it do this soon so I can bend again or is this baby going to have my defiant streak in it and decide to not move lower at all despite what EVERY medical advisor says? Do I remember how to bend?"

Not so graceful, I know, just like my plies right now. But there will soon come a day when the questions will be answered or won't matter anymore. Because I'm holding our son or daughter and breathing just fine.